Oh no!

1st smallfeather

I’m on hiatus from beating myself up – for.the.time.being.

Had a very productive day on Wednesday.  Sorted and chucked out paper work. Filed paper work.  Made a difficult phone call.  Overhauled (serious clean) the bathroom and kitchen (including oven) and went through my wardrobe and made 3 separate piles of clothing; chuck outs; charity bin and give to ____.  I parted with a pair of faithful black track pants that I have had for around 15 freaking years!  Relax! – there’s another pair that I bought the same time that I’ve kept.  Bottom line is, I feel more in control of my life and my world again.

<- To celebrate, I bought myself a dress ->


2 weeks ago Kaiwhakaora Kai was wearing a dress and she looked absolutely stunning.  The impact of seeing Kaiwhakaora Kai in a dress was that she feels safe enough to wear one.  And that struck a note deep within me.

I have a lot of tunics – that I wear either leggings or jeans under – no dresses though.  Soooooooo – I bought one.  And I absofuckinglutely love it.  Unsure if I’m ready to be seen without leggings under the dress (which translates to: unsure if I feel safe enough to wear it without leggings).  I can’t wait for my first public appearance in it though!  I may wear it to my next appointment with Kaiwhakaora Kai and see if she notices …